My Very Worst Enemy (Part 4 – The Finale)

Laura J. Ningkan

We’ve actually met in the mid-year 1991, which I was schooling as primary school in primary 5. That time, a lot of my friends had been quit from school. Some is getting married. Some can’t afford the money to go to school, some is moving with their parent to another town and nevertheless, some is quit because they’re feeling the school is not really important for their lives. Poverty is the main reason why some student had quit school. For those think isn’t important, they quit because the school’s rule. When I’m started to befriended with Laura, at least, I had someone that I can chat with. Like Maria, she was live in my neighborhood. I’m trying to be the good girl here but soon I realized the reality isn’t something nice to see rather than what I thought in my mind. Feeling like sleeping with enemy, she continues manipulates me but I wasn’t easy to manipulate because I know my limit is. Rather than a good girl that I supposed to think, she is the devil that I’m certainly should get away from long time ago. She loves to showing off, bullying other people, mocking others people, and the most part that I hate about her was slandering other people. I can’t believe about myself when I was young sometimes. I’m still standing firm although she’d done many bad things to me. I must admit that I was change ever since I was graduated from the high school and started the life as the college girl with the new identity. Then again, one thing I must admit about her that she’s good in athletic and thought, she was my enemy, she deserved to be cheer because everytime we need a little more shining gold or silver medallion, she’ll be there to save us. She always cheer me up whenever get nervous in speech competition.

Talk about the good-side of Laura, I seldom saw her crying. She was one of the strong girls that I’ve ever met in my life. If someone needs her help, she’ll definitely lend some. She was good supporter and good in certain subjects that had been taught in the school especially English. Unlike the other students in the school, her musical taste is quite different. This was proven when she had introduced me to the Irish band, the Cranberries and the Canadian alternative singer, Alanis Morissette. Apart from that, she’s even introduced me to Ace Of Base when I was in the early of my secondary school years. I thought she was cool compares to most students in the school. Well, she just the student from the big town and no doubt at all that she almost knows everything about the outside world. That because she had better studying facilities compares in the big town. No wonder everyone just adores her and I’m little bit jealous on her. But that’s normal to be jealous. At least, I know there’s someone that I can compete with. I like challenge sometimes especially in competition. However, those bad attitudes in her seem like manipulating her. Rather than becomes her close friend, I’m better distance myself from her in certain things. I’m started to realize about her bad-side in 1992, where we’re entering the school drama play competition for ‘Projek Sang Kang Kancil ‘92’ for Tatau zone. Of course, I’d made the mistake that caused the time is limited but I can’t believe she said something bitchy behind my back. Like I said before, I don’t care she said whoever I was but please, I just don’t want she said the word ‘good luck’ and ‘bad luck’. She’s yelling around at Miss Melati’s (our dance teacher) house and told everybody that I was giving bad luck to our school. I heard it all when I’m running back from SRB Chung Hua to my home which that very far from my home.

At that time, I thought, my dad hadn’t picked me up. It’s almost late at night. Then again, I can’t believe I was running back at home during the late dark night time. Listening to what Laura’s said is pretty ridiculous thing. Oh my God! I’m gone crazy. That is the first time she’s ever said that thing to me. From that moment, I’m decided not to become her close friend anymore. In one incident 1994, where Ita and I was become school prefect. My duty to become school prefect is almost in the line fire when I have to choose my reputation and her skipping school’s case. Therefore, I picked the second choice. Then, she and the rest of the gang started to extort me but I didn’t report it to the teacher instead telling her that I’m never afraid of her intimidation. She used the harsh word that she’s going to ‘kill’ me but I didn’t care what she’s wanted to do. I used to listen to her bad mouth all the times and it feels like listening to a crap. At lot of things she’d done a bad thing on me until it turns countless. Well, as my mum taught me to become a forgiven person and move on with my life, I don’t have a choice then to hold back until the day that comes to me like sunshine that almost blinded my eyes. Until now, I think she has got to do with the big conspiracy in the school. It was proven after all when she was part of the teacher’s hope list. When I’m coming back and took my SPM examination result, someone had told me she left to report herself to the ITM (Institut Teknologi MARA). I had expressed my pride to her through my classmates and left with a smile in my face. In my mind, I knew the war had just begun. Then, we’re totally lost contact just like that.

Ever since I left the school and my hometown 10 years ago, I’ve never contacted her. I feel just wanted to start my life from level zero again. Meeting and searching the new good friends in the hope that they’ll accept me no matter how weird I am. My wish had granted as I’ve met many friends in the college that respected me as my friend. They’re just weird with their own style. I don’t mind if they wanted to dye their spaghetti hair to pink or blonde (that’s what Donald did!) or even putting 3ft stilettos heel, as long as we’re mind our own each other’s business. I’m almost believes what about my friends said about the life of city people. In my own perception, if I’m choosing the right person to be my friend, no matter what it takes, they’re still a nice person. They’re even worst than the city people, overprotective and ugly old-fashioned minded which they thought it’s new, cool and beautiful. In the other hand, Laura had showed to me half of the life being in the big town in Miri (now becomes city). I’m always optimistic in this matter and I have proven to her that I’m successfully finds what I’m looking for in my life. Without her, I never knew whether I could survive in this challenging world. 10 years later, seems like yesterday and I would thought that she will change her immature attitude. When I’m gone back to my hometown, almost everyone talks about ingrown attitude of her. She even received the complained from several students as she’d become the temporary school teacher in my old secondary school. Not only her students but also my young cousins told the same thing. Laura had quit from her job and now working as a clerk in Bintulu Development Authority (BDA) office.

Well, that’s just life with her and the rest of the bad gang in the block. She was one the hero in the school but becomes zero later when she’s out to the challenging world. What I hope for from Laura is wishing her the best throughout her entire life. No matter what she becomes, she’s always live in my mind. It’s ironic that sometimes that I missed her bitchy attitude. Perhaps that because part of her is a nice girl and no doubt at all her bad attitude had manipulated her until everybody left her alone in cold, cold world. If she’s ever read this, well, I hope she’s stop doing this and started to grow as mature and successful girl. Among all of the bitchy friends that I mentioned before, I think her future is brighter. The thing is she’s never giving up to get something that she wants except the way she does it makes me feel uncomfortable. Until now, I think she’s still have a crush on Mr. Amrizan (our school teacher turns Utusan Sarawak reporter). She’s always called him Mr. Saari Amrizan taken from the famous Malaysian songwriter and also composer, Saari Amri that penned most rock ballad songs for the rock band Umbrella and UKs. Too bad, it’s just like a dream that drift away when the morning comes. I’m two weeks older than her and I found we’re almost having the same thing in common. I know that she doesn’t have too many close friends like I did. But our attitude is different. She doesn’t have friends because her bitchy attitude and I was lost more than half friends because of my creative crazy ideas. For whatever things back then, I think she could never let go the past and I managed to do it, although, I must admit that sometimes I can still feel the pain everytime I remember the thing that she’d done on me. It started to fade away just like that and I guess my pain was healed. I’m always remembers her and she will stay here in my mind and my heart. She always been a good competitor although sometimes, she used dirty tricks to get something that she wants. I guess, it’s better to leave it just like that either we can be good friends or stay as perfect enemies.